We can't stop.

Confessions of a Fresher

1.       The first time you are on your own in your new room, it’s the weirdest feeling ever

2.       You will actually meet people. Real ones.

3. Definitely annoying ones.

4.       You’ll be surprised at how quickly you latch on to people. Maybe because you don’t know if anyone else will be better or not. (I’m still stuck with them, help!)

5.       Alcohol will be your saviour. Vodka, Luv u forever && alwayz.

6.       Fresher’s is a must. Fresher’s is the best.

7.       You never realised how much you wanted to win a pub quiz.

8.       Your bank balance when you get your money through is glorious.

9.       Your bank balance the week after you get money through is worrying.

10.   Your bank balance in December hints to the fact you might actually be dead. How will you be able to pay off all the debt? Oh look Student finance is in!

11.   You’re accent will be mocked, no matter what.

12.   Fancy dress is a must.

13.   If you have a night that doesn’t start with pre-drinks, it’s just gonna be shit. Terribly shit.

14.   If you tell people what you don’t like/fear etc. it’s sort of guaranteed you will be faced with it at some point, mainly in Truth or Dare.

15.   You will have conversations about sex probably every day. Maybe even google a cheeky camel toe or pretty penis.

16.   You’re guilty pleasures won’t be guilty anymore. Or at least shared guilty pleasures. HIGH SCHOOOOL MUSICAL!

17.   Scary people are called scary for a reason.

18.   The unplanned nights are DEFINITELY the best.

19.   You will be so excited to go home, you feel like a kid at Disney.

20.   You get home and realise you are classed as an adult now, so wanna go back to uni and act like a kid again.

21.   You’ll wonder why they tell you to read so much. You don’t actually need it. Not yet anyway.

22.   You know you should do your work but, NAH.

23.   You’ll think uni is a piece of piss.

24.   You’ll think uni is the hardest shit you’ve ever done.

25.   Halls is actually like big brother, just without the nominations. (Evictions, possible. On 3^rd floor = likely.)

26.   You want to decorate your room and make it cute. You don’t though.

27.   If you’re used to posh nosh, stop. When you have £7 to last you 2 weeks, 17p noodles are God.

28.   You will drink the cheapest thing going and make yourself like it.

29.   If you get through the year without doing one dirty pint, then you are invisible. Or a pussy.

30.   But, if you are poor, you will volunteer to do the dirty pint.

31.   You will be put in horrible situations.

32.   You might be Drunk in Love but you won’t wake up feeling like P. Diddy.

33.   Get sick. Get sick. Got sick.

34.   You’ll have the best opportunities you wouldn’t expect.

35.   You will break the law and watch live TV without a TV license. Just because you don’t wanna wait until the next day for Coach Trip to come on 4OD.

36.   You’ll see a change in either the way you behave or think or both.

37.   You take washing clothes and the dishes for granted when you are at home.

38.   At the start of the year you’ll offer everyone anything. Maybe even your vagina. 2 weeks in and you’ll regret it.

39.   Your kitchen will be disgusting.

40.   You’ll meet the best people ever and wonder how you lived without them.

41.   You’ll also hate said people at the same time and want to live without them.

42.   Summer is your goal for everything.

43.   You won’t go out for a week and wonder why God has punished you with such a shit social life.

44.   House hunting for year 2 is so good, if you are prepared and get a nice place.

45.   Your cutlery goes missing for unknown reasons.

46.   You can see that the cleaner hates you but she just doesn’t wanna say it.

47.   Foam parties have never been better.

48.   Silent disco’s have never been better.

49.   You will think you have made the worst decision ever.

50.   Then you realise that although it can be hard it’s the best thing you have ever done and you will remember it forever.

Pack Up Your Troubles.

Hey whore,

So sadly,again this might be a little depressing Well, it will be a depressing subject but I'll try and make it chipper. (Not gonna happen)

I do hope you don't judge me from these latest blog posts because since I published the last one, I instantly got over it and I am on top of the world again. Where I belong. Bow down, bitches.

Anyway, in case you didn't know, I go STATESIDE in 17 days. 

Yesterday, I was with Roisin in the middle of packing all my stuff up ready to leave for summer next Friday. I was on the phone to Donatron, just having a casual chat like we always do when she tells me the following conversation she had with my Nan...

Nan: Aw, it will be nice if we can go for a meal or something with Harry before he goes away.

Mum: Yeah, if we have the money we will do. That will be nice.

Nan: After all, it could be the last time I see him. 

Then my mum recalled how she shouted at her and told her to stop being so stupid.

I instantly burst into tears. 

I hate crying in front of people, but this time I didn't even care. 

I don't know if it was the shock of hearing it being said, or the realisation that it genuinely could be the last time I see her. Obviously, I hope that she lives forever and I'll never have to say goodbye because I love her with all of my heart, but that isn't realistic. 

It got me thinking about America. I know, and my family know that if anything were to go wrong , I'd be home instantly. No matter how much fun I am having, the opportunities I get or however far away from home I am, my family will ALWAYS come first, to anybody and to anything. I know I'll stand by that for the rest of my life. After all, I wouldn't be thinking this way right now if it wasn't for them and the way they have brought me up and accepted me.

But it got me thinking, if you knew it was the last time you were going to see someone, what would you do?

Would you say goodbye? Would you give it a finite ending and close the chapter? Or would you carry on as normal knowing that although they aren't their to tell you what to do, you can learn from their life and that is how they will guide you? 

If you knew it was you that was going to die, would you want to know so you can prepare and say your goodbyes? Or would you rather cherrish the time you have and let life end the way it should... unexpectedly.

The idea of being able to say goodbye is peaceful. But if it were me, I wouldn't want to have the time ticking against me.

Nobody knows if it will be the last time I see Nan. Everybody hopes it isn't the last time I see her. However, as long as the times I do see her I can show her how much I love her, care for her, thank her and continue to be inspired by her, then we will both know that our time spent together was worth every second.

P.s. I Pinky Promise my next blog post will be a happy one. I'm sick of reading about my depression, never mind you.

xo

Regrets, I've made a few, but then again, too few to mention.

Ok, so I said when I started this blog that I’d try and keep it light hearted. I have. Until now. You’ll have to excuse me though because I need help.

Everyone said that uni would be a massive change and that it will be the best thing you will ever do. The 3 years you will remember forever and look back on with fond memories. And I can honestly say that I will. Over the past months, I know there have been times that have been shit, and when I’ve been through them I’ve made no secret of how shit I thought they have been. But looking back, I only ever remember the good points. Fresher’s, Holly ball, going home for Christmas and plenty of others. All of them were amazing. But over the past few weeks, it’s been hard.

I have only really just realised that it’s only hard because everything that I’ve learnt throughout my life so far has never been doubted as much as now and I don’t know what to think anymore.

Do you stay true to what you think because that is what you believe in? It has gotten you this far and it is only recently that you have been unhappy.

Or do you change it because you are unhappy and you shouldn’t be? People are telling you what is right and wrong and even though you may not fully agree with it, you can see the point they are trying to make.

For example, you wanted to buy a burger so you bought it. But then someone told you they wasn’t happy you bought the burger and you was in the wrong. You think to yourself, well I wanted the burger so that is why I had it. You don’t want to live your life for someone else. But you have just upset someone. What do you do? Do you stick with your gut and think well at least you done what you wanted, or next time you don’t get the burger because you unintentionally upset someone?

And then, as you have been pondering through the past 8 months relatively happy, confirming to yourself that the decisions you have made in the past were the right ones you realise that they weren’t, or maybe things could have been dealt with better, what do you do?

You have a necklace. And you’ve had it for years, and you know that the necklace isn’t in fashion anymore. And you know in your head that you don’t want to wear it, but your heart tells you there is history there and without wearing that necklace, you wouldn’t have noticed how the fashion has changed. So you have learnt from wearing the necklace. But you don’t see how continuing wearing that necklace in the future, when you have already realised it’s not fashionable, is going to teach you anymore lessons. So accidentally you break the necklace but you aren’t too bothered. And then a little later, you get a diamond ring. And it’s all nice and sparkly for a bit but under the surface, no matter how much you tell everyone you prefer the diamond ring, you still miss the necklace and want it back. What do you do?

The necklace is gone and it will never be the same again, but do you try your best to mend the necklace, even if you can’t wear it, just so that you can look back to when you did wear it and think of the positives it brought you. You don’t necessarily want to wear it but you want to be happy thinking about it. Is it possible to do that?

Then, when you speak your mind, is it always completely 100% necessary to say exactly what you think there and then? Because, let’s be honest, everyone thinks bad things. But if saying those bad things is going to lead to a disagreement that you see as unnecessary, surely it would be better to just say nothing, it will fade, you won’t think about it again and no harm is done. Or should you be completely honest and face the consequences because people have told you they want you to be honest, even when you know the consequences could be drastic and completely change the dynamic?

I have only realised about 40 mins before writing this that I threw away something I now deeply regret. But it’s too late to change it. And I’ve gone a long arse way of saying it but I am sorry about what has happened.

I am a firm believer in not having regrets. However, I did have one. Now I have two. But if those regrets allow me to remember things and learn from my mistakes, then I can be content with having them in my life. 

Mean Girls Drinking Game - The best game you could ever meet.

Hey skank bitches,

Me and some fugly sluts have reworked the King of all drinking games Ring of Fire. With cheeky little quotes, here’s a list of ways to get FUCKED before you go out dressed like Regulation Hotties.

A - The limit does not exist – essentially waterfall.

2 - NONE FOR GRETCHEN WEINERS, BYE – Not allowed to drink until the next turn.

3 - Like Ugh, Kevin 3! – Hip thrust master

4 - 4 for you Glen Coco – Drink 4 sips

5 - I was half a virgin when I met him – Drink half of your drink, No excuses!

6 - Don’t have SIX, because you will get pregnant, AND DIE – The first two people to pick a 6 have to have pretend sex until the next 6 is picked. The 3^rd and 4^th 6 pickers have to do the same, until the group decide.

7 - You have been personally victimized by Regina George – Seven Heaven

8 - You can’t sit with us – Musical chairs, whoever loses can’t sit with us.

9 - Made out with a hot dog? That was one NINE!! – Spin the bottle, kiss for 9 seconds

10 - I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK! – Swap an item of clothing with the person to your left. In the pair, you have to choose which one drinks all of their drink. If they can’t decide both down their drinks.

J - Jingle bell Jack – Duck duck goose with a 3 second head start!

Q - Everyone is Spring Fling Queen. – Drink your feelings.

K - Is there alcohol in this? – Dirty pint!!!!!!!!

Joker - Too gay to function – The group choose the person to do something difficult.

LOVE YA, xoxo